As I look back over the last several months I realize that I want to write the things down to help work through thoughts and feelings. Write things down that I don't want to forget. About him or the things my kids say about him. Since I haven't posted in so long maybe I don't have to worry anymore. So here goes....
Today is Atticus' 5th birthday. He is a nephew to Zeb and me and a cousin to our girls. He is our family here in Texas and I need to write about him.
This morning when Claire came out dressed for school she was in Atti's colors but she had a blanket wrapped around her like she always does. I said, "Girls why don't you wear Atti's colors to school today?" Claire said, "Mom, I am." And she took her blanket off. I love that she thought through this and did it on her own. He sisters followed suit and they were decked with blue and orange, Atticus pins, bows in their hair, and of course the bracelets that haven't left our wrists. I remember one time when I was with Cindy and I gasped, "Where is my bracelet?" It came off when I took off a long sleeved shirt that morning and the girls ended up finding it for me. I never take it off.
Last night Claire, Hallie, and Audrey cried themselves to sleep. They had a garbage can full of tissues. They were missing Atticus. He is their little buddy and they miss him. When Audrey came home from school today she said, "Mom, I pretty much cried the whole day today because I miss Atticus." Which she said as she was crying. I love my girls so much. I love that they love Atticus so much. We all do. That little boy had such a way around people. He could have you laughing in minutes. I remember when he was born (well not BORN born) but after he was born how much hair that boy had. Oh my goodness. I have NEVER seen that much hair. And it was beautiful. Like a shiny silky lions mane.
Here are little bits of the letters the girls wrote to Atticus for his birthday. I was going to take a picture of them but forgot.
Julia said, "My favorite memory of you is that I love you."
Audrey said, "My favorite memory of Atticus is when you came to my birthday party and were buzz lightyear. You were so cute and you would shoot your lazer. You are special to me because you are so sweet and kind. I love you." P.S. When I miss you I think of being able to see you again and that helps me feel better.
Hallie's note sounded like a 12 year old wrote it. She said "My favorite memory of Atticus is when I got to see him before he passed away. I know that if we follow Christ that we can live with Atti again. Sometimes Jesus gives us trials that we don't understand. Like when Atticus got his angel wings. We love your family and I am so glad I got to know Atticus. I am grateful you are in our lives. Atticus is the sweetest boy I have ever known." Love, Hallie P.S. I wrote this myself.
Claire's mature letter was to the very loved Hansen Pack "My favorite memory of Atticus is when we rode in a limo to Macdonalds and when we got there we took a tour. When we were in the kitchen they pulled cookies out of the oven and Atticus shouted, "OOOHHH cookies!" When they gave us toys from the workroom he was so grateful. Atticus has such a spunky and fun personality. I know that if we follow the prophet we can live with him again." Love, Claire
The girls colored a picture of Cindy and Me in blue and orange that had rain clouds. On the back it said, "Friends are what help you though the rain in life. Like you and my mom."
We took Atticus balloons. That boy loved balloons and he needed some for his birthday.
Tonight we have a special family home evening planned for Atticus.
xoxo
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